It’s no secret that I’ve been slowly working to simplify my life. Whether it’s decluttering my home, my schedule, or my mind, I’ve been seeking out ways to get rid of the superfluous so that I can focus on what’s truly meaningful and important to me.
While I’ve had a lot of discussions with my 6-year-old about our simplification efforts, and included him in a lot of our decluttering – especially when his possessions (see HERE), art (see HERE), or other items he’s concerned about are involved, I haven’t overtly directly discussed most of this with my 2-year-old. And while my 2-year-old has been on the periphery of all of this simplification-driven activity, he hasn’t been directly involved in the decision-making that’s happened throughout our home. But it became obvious that he was absorbing some sort of message, particularly about decluttering our things.
We went to visit my extended family my over the holidays. And while we were there, my boys received wonderful and thoughtful gifts from their relatives. As my 2-year-old opened his presents, I realized how much of what’s been happening over the last year that’s he’s absorbed.
Each time my 2-year-old opened a gift, he turned to me and asked, “Mama, you’re not giving this away?” I felt a mixture of pride, My child knows we don’t keep things in our house that we don’t love or use regularly, and sadness, Does my 2-year-old think I’m going to give away his new things that he’s excited about? ::sigh::
So I took him in my lap and clarified to my little guy that I won’t ever give away things that he wants to keep. I reminded him that we always decide together what stays and goes, and that he’ll have a voice in all decisions about his things. And I explained that passing on things we no longer use to someone else who will use them creates space for the things we currently use and love (like his new shovel).
I don’t know that he fully understood my explanations, but I think he comprehended most of it. A few minutes later he brought me a big stack of used wrapping paper and declared, “Mama, you give THIS away.”
I know exactly the feeling you were talking about. As my little guy and I put up Christmas decorations this past month he kept looking at me and saying earnestly “Thank you for not giving these away Mama. I really like decorating with you.”
Yes, it’s definitely the same feeling.
How did you respond?
This was sweet to read, and I relate. In the past, I worried I would create hoarders by ruthlessly decluttering over the years. Two of mine are fine with getting rid of things they don’t adore. But one has a really hard time letting go of anything, and you can tell when you look in his room. It looks a little cluttered to me, though he also loves to keep it tidy thankfully. He has lots of tiny “treasures” on his dresser top (mostly contained in a couple little open wooden boxes), a little cabinet full of more “treasures”, and window clings on his window, drawings and stickers taped on his door, and toys under the bed! His room is tiny, but everything has a place. As he’s matured, he still keeps his favorites, but he has grown to love an uncluttered space. He just keeps it all contained. He makes his bed and never goes to sleep with a mess. Now, he knows what his favorites are and is willing to pass along things he has outgrown. He also loves it when I help him clean out the excess now. So I am not so worried about him becoming a hoarder anymore! Phew! The other two are quick to say when they don’t want something because they know what they DO like having around, and they do not like messes. 😉
It sounds like all of your kids have really internalized the lesson that it’s okay to part with things they don’t need. Thank you for sharing!